2017 - The Year of...

Thanks for the tremendous feedback I received to my last blog on what happened in 2016. I fully admit that mostly I do this as an outlet for me. It sometimes is easier to get my thoughts down on paper (at least digitally). But I have had many people reach out in the last couple of days to share their stories and other sorts of encouragement. Thank you for that, it means a lot to me! :) So now onto 2017.

I am not much for traditional New Year's resolutions. Sure, I have done those before, but for me those are just short-term wishes that end up falling apart in just a few weeks. That said, I do believe in the power of living with intention and goal setting. Too often I find myself simply reacting and responding to what life throws at me rather than trying to live proactively. I may blame lack of time or 'busyness' but in truth it's often just me not managing things the best way possible.

Last year my intention was to try to make some small changes in my life that when added together would get me to a better place. Dr. Blake Wagner taught this at one of our work events a couple years ago and it stayed with me. Sometimes we get so overwhelmed by big goals we actually get unproductive and 'fall off the wagon'. So I tried things like taking my vitamin once a day (basic, but I never did that...and maybe not coincidentally I think I was sick less last year), walking more to hit my 10,000 steps per day, trying to drink more water, finishing some 'unfinished projects' around the house, writing my 3 thankful things etc. To be honest my record with those is pretty hit and miss, but even if I succeeded with half of them that was a vast improvement over what would have happened otherwise.

So with that in mind the last couple weeks of the year I started to think about what I would like to see happen in 2017. At times I felt a little out of control of things in 2016 and I really wanted to feel like I wasn't constantly having things come together at the last minute. So I spent some time at the office cleaning up. I admit that I'm not the neatest person by nature and I constantly say I don't mind it, but you know what? I think I DO mind it. I cannot tell you how peaceful I felt when I walked into work Tuesday to a clean desk rather than piles of stuff everywhere. The work is still there and it still needs to get done but I feel like I have a more peaceful mind with which to accomplish that work.

Secondly, I felt like at the dawn of a new decade in my life I should try to break out of my normal routines. I remember reading an article on the successful show biz producer Shonda Rhimes a couple years ago and how she had a year of "Yes" where she intentionally tried to accept things that were offered to her. That stuck with me. But in truth, I don't think I have a problem saying yes (maybe I need the year of no, haha). So after thinking about it for a few days I decided to make 2017 the Year of NEW for me. I tend to get stuck in a rut so my goal is to do/learn/listen to/watch something new everyday this year and then to journal about it and what I learned.

It sounds fun to say the year of new, but in reality I know that some of these new things will not be pleasant. They may be stressful or sad but they might also be exhilarating, inspiring or life changing. I won't know until try it so that's what my intention is for this year. I'm a few days in and so far my 'new' things haven't been too exciting but even listening to a new album, starting the year with a clean office or reading a new book can change your perspective on something. I'm excited to see what I learn and where this takes me.

Incidentally I'm still work on my 'small habits' intention from last year. First step is to start drinking more water and less junk! I'm interested to hear what you think and what you hope to do in 2017!

Happy New Year!

2016 The Year of Everything and Nothing -- A retrospective

So you are probably thinking I forgot all about this blog, my promise to my mom and my goals, right? The answer is both yes and no. I never forgot but life got in the way, as life tends to do! It's the beginning of 2017 and it's been four years (!!) since I last blogged but I thought I would dust this account off and start tracking my progress on some different goals.

2016 was one of the most interesting years in recent memory. On a national level it was filled with divisiveness, anger, loss, change, and confusion. For me personally it's hard to really to classify. It was the year I turned 40. Society says I should struggle with this age, but in truth I feel more comfortable in my own skin than I ever have. It was a year of immense changes at work that necessitated a lot of long hours handing multiple jobs. Yet, it was also a year filled with many professional successes such as chairing a national association board, presenting at a national conference and seeing much success locally.

It was also a year that I decided to get out of credit card debt. That debt was an albatross around my neck and I felt deep shame and an overwhelming powerlessness to change it. Then I sat down with a friend who is a financial planner and we put a plan in place to try to tackle it. My original goal was to pay it off in 18 months and truthfully that seemed like wishful thinking at the time. Yet, I'm very blessed to say that if all holds I should be paid off sometime in the next 6 weeks, just about 13 months after I started!!! (No secrets, just doing the cash envelope budget system and putting all available $$ towards my debt.)

In March 2016, buoyed by my success with my debt and after several months of just overwhelming stress and pressure, I felt convicted to try to find something to be thankful for everyday. I started with a goal of 3 things but almost immediately every day had 4-5 different things. Truthfully, there were some very difficult days where I had to think really big picture about thankful things. But most days were filled with individual blessings, normal, humble and mundane (and a few extraordinary ones). I started to notice how this act started to change my attitude and outlook during stressful times. It's a habit I'm keeping in 2017.

2016 had one last gut punch for me -- learning that my beloved dog, Ginger, had terminal lymphoma and our days together were numbered. I had adopted Ginger just a little over a year after losing mom. She has been my faithful companion and best friend through some of the most trying days of my life. To say the diagnosis was devastating is probably an understatement. But after my initial despair I pulled it together to try to make Ginger's last months filled with lots of love, kisses, snuggles, treats, walks, rides in the car with her head out the window and all the things she loves.

I started this blog post to write about 2017 but I guess I needed to write about 2016. So tomorrow I'll fill you in on what I'm planning for this upcoming year! Happy New Year!

A beautiful day for a run...

Wow...we've had sort of a miracle happen here in Rochester lately.  The sun. Shining. In March.  It was day 2 of gorgeous blue skies and sun.  I had to miss my morning group run with Fleet Feet due to a Rotary meeting but after having lunch with my Gram, I headed out for a run!  I decided to leave my pup at home today. I wanted the luxury of being able to run without having to worry about what she was doing or if we would see any other dogs.  I ran a little over 3 miles at about a 14:30 pace (averaged). I started faster but slowed a bit at the end. But I felt good the whole way.

In two weeks it will be my one-year anniversary of running!  It was a beautiful day, much like today, a year ago that I decided to start the Couch 2 5K program. I readily admit that I had no idea a year later that I'd still be running, but I am thrilled about it!

So I guess it's time to share one of my goals for the year: run a half marathon.  Yep, 13.1 here I come!  That seems crazy to even type, but after I did the Race with Grace 10K (6.2) at Thanksgiving I started to believe that with time and the proper training, I too can join the ranks of half marathoners.  Will a full marathon be in my future....who knows? I don't have any plans to run one now but if I continue to train and lose weight...the sky is the limit! :)

I have a couple other goals for the year...I'll try to share those in a separate blog post.  Thanks for all the lovely comments and notes of encouragement.  This is a long, slow process (much like my running...haha) but it's been most worthwhile. I wholeheartedly believe my mom is up in heaven cheering me on to success.

Happy Saturday!

It's about time for an update...

Wow.  Time flies!!! I can't believe that I haven't posted a blog since Thanksgiving...yikes.  Well the good news is, I have still been working away at my goal.  I'm very pleased to say that through the holidays I've maintained my weight loss. I'm still hovering around the 25 lbs lost mark.  I admit that once the Fleet Feet No Boundaries running program ended mid-December that I really backed off of running for a while.

I ran only a couple times during the whole month of January. I had some foot pain so part of that was just resting my foot but part of it was just that it was so dang cold outside! ;)

NoBo started back up a few weeks ago and I'm proud to say that I've been able to make most of the training sessions so far.  I'm also very happy that my times are steadily hovering around the 14 minute a mile mark.  I'm hopeful that in the next couple weeks that I can push myself to go up a little bit to the 13's group.  I'm still in the process of picking my races for the year but I'm excited to say that 11 months after I first went out for a run that I'm still running all these months later!!!

I've been putting together some goals for the year (I know, I know...it's already almost March) and I plan to share those in the next few days.  I'm just a few days away from the 2nd anniversary of my mom's passing.  It seems fitting that I unveil these goals for the year as I get ready for that day.  Thanks for all the wonderful support...it really means the world to me!

Happy Thanksgiving Mom!

Dear Mom,

It's hard to believe it's been a year and eight months since you passed. I miss you every day.  Today is Thanksgiving and I'm so thankful that I had a wonderful mother like you.  I think you would be pretty proud of how I am (finally) starting to fulfill my promise to you, mom.  At this point I've lost about 27 lbs since the spring.  It took me a while to get going but I don't think I've ever been more committed to exercise than I am right now. Beyond the weight loss, I just feel good!

This morning I ran the Race with Grace 10K!  It was by far the longest I've ever run and I am so excited to tell you that I ran the whole thing.  Dad came out to cheer me on. As I ran through the finish line I thought of you and what you would be thinking of this whole thing.  I know you would be proud and perhaps a little surprised.  I know I am surprised.  There have been a few things in my life that I have really set my mind to and accomplished something amazing. This is one of those times. 

Whenever I get tired or discouraged and think I can't keep going, I think of you mom.  Not only how doggedly you fought your disease, but also just how doggedly you lived your life. You had a lot of loss and tough things happen and you just kept going, picking yourself up and moving on.  You left us all a wonderful example to follow.

I miss you tons and wish more than anything I could drive to your house and tell you this in person, but I guess I'll have to rely on the heavenly internet. 

Happy Thanksgiving Mom!

One year ago...

I'm all packed up and ready to head out to the cottage (see photo below) for our week of vacation. I'm pretty excited for a week off from my busy job.  This week marks an important anniversary though.  It was one year ago when I was on vacation at the cottage that I decided to embark on this journey of weight loss and getting healthy.  While I haven't achieved everything I had hoped for I thought it would be good to give an update on where I have been.

First, I started last year with great intentions and motivation.  But as with everything else, life got in the way.  I never gave up, but I cannot deny that I have had some really tough and trying times in the last 12 months.  So this goal sort of took a back seat.  Understandable but disappointing nonetheless. I originally hoped that I would have lost a lot more weight by now.  Oh well...

Second, the good news is that I have not given up and I am making real progress!  One of my goals for 2012 was to run a 5K (in fact a few of them).  As you may know, I'm nearing completion of the Couch 2 5K running program. I started and stopped it a few times before late April when it finally took hold.  I was reflecting the other day and realized that I've been doing this running 'thing' for over 60 days now...so I believe it's officially a habit! :)  I'm only a couple weeks away from finishing and then to try my first 5K.  I'm still deciding which one but I hope to run a few before the year ends...including the one I am in charge of "Race on the Ridge" in the fall!

Third, I have started to lose weight again.  I find that the exercise I am doing makes me want to eat healthier.  I'm trying to listen to that voice inside which says 'eat healthier' and I think it's finally starting to come together.  I'm not doing anything organized (such as weight watchers). I will need to eventually, but I'm trying this for now.

Finally, I have had several people ask me if I still plan to do my trek to the Himalayas.  The answer is both yes and no.  Realistically, I cannot commit to the trek that is going next November because I don't know that I have the time to get in shape the way I need to.  However, YES I do still plan to do this.  The group I was going to go with also leads yearly treks to the top of Mt. Kilimanjaro.  That would been a pretty cool alternative and I wouldn't have to wait as long.  In fact, my Aunt Donna, who passed away in October, had planned to climb 'Kili' so if I do this, it would be very fitting.

That's the long and short of the situation. I'm not where I had hoped to be but I am moving in the right direction.  Thanks for all the great support this year.  Let's see what the next year brings, shall we?

Working out on vacation

I am up at our family cottage for the Fourth. Almost the whole family is here (not everyone though) so it is quite hectic. This morning I woke up and decided that I needed to continue my training. I was worried if I took too many days off I might not get back. That is a pretty momentous decision in and of itself for me. Usually when I am on vacation I take a break from working out. So not only was I breaking from tradition this would involve a bit of a drive. See the cottage is set amongst a really hilly part of NY. Though I have seen vast improvement in my endurance I knew I wouldn't be able to run those hills. So I drove out to the nearest high school track. Thanks to North Rose- Wolcott I was able to get my run in! Now I can get back to relaxing. Have a great day! :)

An Update of Sorts...

Wow, so it's apparently been 3 months since I've updated my blog.  Shame on me!

The good news is that I have been busy in that time.  After starting and stopping the Couch 2 5K program three times I am pleased to report I just finished Week 5.  In fact, today was a big milestone. Every other day so far has had running and walking intervals interchanging.  Today I just had to run 20 minutes. I say 'just' but that is a BIG deal for me.

I could never do the mile run in high school gym class. I was actually an athlete in high school, playing tennis and softball, but running was not my thing.  As I've worked through these weeks of training I have definitely noticed the change in my running ability.  I have lost a few pounds, not a lot yet though. That will come.  Once I can run the 5K I plan to make running a regular part of my routine!

So today was a pretty big deal.  The girl who couldn't do the mile just ran more than a mile.  The best part was that I felt good at the end, not like I was going to die. Haha!

I promise to keep better tabs on the blog, especially as I train for my first 5K.  It's only weeks away it seems! :)

Day 3

Today was my third day of working out.  I did the week 1, day 2 workout for Couch 2 5K. Yesterday I did 60 minutes of yoga.  I hope to alternate the two workouts over the next few weeks. I admit, I'm pretty sore tonight.  I want to be careful how much I increase the running at this point so I may end up repeating week 1 again. 

Today I was inspired by this quote:

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain

 If there is anything I learned by going through things with my mom's illness, it is you shouldn't put off tomorrow's plans forever. I'm a terrible procrastinator sometimes.  Sometimes you have to be. You can't possibly live with a "Carpe Diem" attitude every single day.  That said, I want to slowly start changing my attitude.  Get out of the rut. Do the things you dream of doing.  You may not accomplish them all at once, in fact, you may never accomplish them at all.  But I am firmly convinced that the journey is worth it.

So, what's your inspiration?

It wasn't pretty...

It was a beautiful, sunny and surprisingly warm March day. I was laying on my couch reading the paper. Suddenly I had a thought.  I had been meaning to look up the "Couch to 5K" program for a while now, but life (as it always does) had gotten in the way.  Today was a rare and wonderful day where I had absolutely NOTHING on my schedule.  I grabbed my iPhone and a few minutes later had downloaded the "Couch to 5K" app and was on my way.  I popped up and started to get ready, shortly thereafter I was out the door and on my way.

It wasn't pretty I'm sure, but the important thing is I did it! I completed the Week 1, Day 1 (W1D1) workout and I feel pretty good.  The theory is that anyone can run a 5K with 9 weeks of careful training.  You basically alternate running and walking until you are able to run the whole 3.1 miles. 

So hopefully this is just the beginning of a new workout regime.  Actually, I have also been doing some yoga in the last few weeks too. I am hoping to alternate that with the running workout.

People have been asking me about my goals and how I am doing. Why hadn't I updated my blog? Was I still working to lose weight? Had I given up?  The short answer is that life got in the way.  I had a stressful fall, and then bought a house this winter and so my time and attention was diverted for a while.  Did I give up? Well, no not in my heart but I admit that I had to take a break from this while I focused elsewhere.  I'm hoping to be a bit more faithful in posting now (and in my workouts).

But here I am, back at it.  For some reason, buying a house seems to have spurred me on to doing things I never thought I would do, such as becoming a neat freak. ;-)  All I know is that it's one step and one day at a time and if I continue to work hard, I can do this!  Thanks for the support!

A Brief Update

It's late this evening but I wanted to take a minute to give you a brief update on my progress. I have run into several people lately who have mentioned they like reading my blog. I'm so humbled by that! It honestly astonishes me that anyone is interested in my ramblings. :)  Thank you for all the encouragement people have provided. One of the biggest reasons I decided to start a blog for this journey was the accountability it would provide. By making my "BHAG" public I also was making myself accountable for meeting it!

This year has definitely been tough on many fronts. October was no exception. I'm happy to report that a couple weeks ago I stepped on the scale (after not weighing myself for a couple weeks) and was officially down 15.2 pounds!!!  That was very exciting.  Unfortunately I have put a couple pounds back on in the ensuing weeks.

I keep saying this, but this really is about more than just weight for me. One of my other big challenges is my very hectic schedule.  So as you might guess the last couple weeks have been very stressful to me and that never usually means good things on the weight front.  With the changing of the weather I have also gotten out of my walking habit.  However, I am going to make a very concerted effort over the next few weeks (before the official start of the holidays) to get up to the Town and use their indoor walking track at least 2-3 days a week.  I was good at doing that a few years ago and I need to get back to it.  I'm also trying to cut down on needless calories. I admit, I broke down and had a peppermint mocha today but I've been doing pretty good at limiting myself to tea (which is so much better for me).

In October I was also blessed to be able to go to the country of Iceland. What a wonderful place to visit!!  Here is a photo from there. I hope to blog a little more about it in the future. I just wanted to check in on here for tonight -- more for myself than anything -- to reconfirm that I really am still working on this crazy goal!  Thanks friends...

My best inspiration

Losing weight is hard.  I guess if it were easy, everyone would do it.  It's not a hard concept to grasp (eat less calories than you are using) but so often the execution goes awry.  I'll be honest, there are days when I just don't want to deal with this. I am tempted to just say "forget it" and eat whatever I want -- and sometimes I do. 

But as I recently traveled back from an overseas trip I meditated a bit on my journey and why I am trying to do this. I thought about all the obstacles I have come up against (the biggest one being myself) and a thought occurred to me that hasn't before.  I have to be strong and tackle this just as my mom had to be strong and tackle her disease.

I'm reminded of that resolve because as I write this my aunt is currently in the final stages in her own battle with cancer.  It's hard for me to make sense of all of this right now, but I can tell you this: my mom & her sister have both inspired me in the way they faced down their disease and fought back.

I had a front row seat in my mom's battle and let me share with you what I saw. From the moment of her diagnosis my mom was an inspiration.  There were no "woe is me" moments, but a clear resolve to do everything she could to fight back.  She had treatments with at least four different kinds of chemo (and all the various side-effects they caused), went through 2 major rounds of radiation, fought of an infection that nearly killed her, spent nearly 6 weeks (not consecutive) in the hospital, walked around with an oxygen tank, took more pills than she knew what to do with, gained and lost weight and had countless blood transfusions.  There was no 'time off' from having cancer.  She dealt with nausea, digestive issues, hives, weakness, sores, hairloss, confusion and more.  Cancer doesn't fight fair.

And through it all, my mom dealt with it with grace.  My aunt has also battled just as hard with her disease.  I wish with all my heart that I didn't have to have this type of inspiration but watching both of them tells me that I come from tough stock.  If they can go through all of this, literally feeling like hell, then I can suck it up and accomplish this task. 

I only hope that I can do it with as much grace and dignity as they have.  Love you two...

Carpe Diem

“I went to the woods because I wanted to live deliberately, I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, To put to rout all that was not life and not when I had come to die Discover that I had not lived.” - Henry David Thoreau (Used in the movie Dead Poets Society)

I am approaching my birthday here in just a little over a month, it's a time that always makes me a bit contemplative.  The act of turning another year older always makes me pause and assess my life.  I'm not approaching a decade birthday  (20, 30, 40) but it's a mid-decade birthday.  It's also a number that I used to casually toss out as sort of a deadline in my life.

For example, if I'm not _____ by the time I'm 35, then I'll do _______.  For me it was usually if I'm not married by the time I'm 35 then I'll do ________.  And guess what, I'm not married (nor likely soon to be).  So I have to admit there is a little bit of trepidation at looking at life beyond this age. It's not that it's old or that it's even all that scary to be single, it's just that life is turning out a bit different than I had anticipated.  

 

Of course, I didn't anticipate that I would lose my mom at this age either.  This is something that I shouldn't have to face until I'm in my 50s or 60s, not my 30s.  Not when my brother and his wife had their first baby and my parents (finally) have their first grandchild.  Not when she won't be around for the coming milestones in our lives.  That isn't supposed to happen until I'm older, not when I still need her.

 

But here it is and I must live the life I have been given.  This process of losing weight is all tied up into this assessment of my life.  I kept thinking I would accomplish that 'someday' and it turns out that I can't wait for someday.  I need and want to do it now.  It's not just my weight that I've put off. There have been other things (traveling, hobbies, interests, etc) that I've often sacrificed for 'someday'.  I won't be able to do them all at once but I'm trying to start a little at a time.  Challenging myself to push beyond the limits of my comfort zone.  Do something just a bit out of the ordinary.  Live.

 

Of course, some of you who know me might be thinking 'what the heck do you think you've been doing for the last 34 years?"  And to be fair, in my humble opinion, I have already lived a pretty great life.  But there's always more I want to do.    I tell my staff at work, ideas are never a problem for me, I always have more of them! 

So I'm trying to stop putting things off as if I'm waiting for life to begin.  Relax, I'm not doing anything crazy but just trying not to say if I'm not _____ by the time I'm __, then I'll do ______.  If there is one thing that my mom taught me, it's that life is precious and each day is a gift. I have to try to squeeze the most out of it.

A Fun Story

It's hard to believe that it's been almost seven months since my mom passed away.  In some ways it feels like just yesterday and in other ways it feels like a lifetime ago.  Tonight I want to share a great story about my mom that really captures her essence, and hopefully helps you to understand just why exactly I am willing to undertake this crazy idea.

About 5 years ago my mom's youngest sister turned 50.  She decided for her birthday that she wanted to climb the tallest mountain in NYS - Mt. Marcy.  Standing at 5,344 ft. Mt. Marcy is in the High Peak region of the Adirondack Park.  It's a strenuous hike from my understanding and not something typically to be done on a whim but on the other hand it isn't technical mountain climbing either. 

My mom and their other sister accompanied her as well as various other family and friends, all women, on this hike.  (I knew my limits and sat it out! :)   My mom at the time was just a couple years shy of 60 and had no intention of hiking to the top.  She went out on the trail with the group that day wearing her cheap discount store windpants and some plain walking-type sneakers.  She had no trekking poles but having been told by the others that it would be helpful she creatively made one out of a broomstick handle. :) And she set out without a drop of water and only some grapes in a cooler backpack that she had.

She had no intention of going more than a mile or two along the path but one thing led to another and as the story goes, before they knew it my mom was out ahead of some of the more experienced climbers.  Eventually one of my cousins did give her a set of trekking poles so she could do the thing properly.  As you might guess, she made it to the top (GO MOM!) and the picture here is her on top of the mountain. I cropped the others out since I didn't ask their permission to post this but the full picture tells the story.  Everyone else in their hiking boots and gear and my mom looking like she just ran out to go to the corner grocery store and accidentally climbed a mountain.

My aunt said that when they reached to the top my mom looked at her and said "so where is the ride down?"  We laughed about that for a while.  Not sure now if she really thought there was (similar to Whiteface Mountain) or she was just pulling my aunts leg.

So they all climbed down. My mom outstripped them all again some of the time.  She ate her refreshing and trusty grapes along the way (I'm guessing someone took pity and gave her water).  And when they got down to the bottom and my 20-something cousin could absolutely walk no more without her legs seizing up, my mother volunteered to go get the car and pick them up. 

I love that story because it's so representative of how awesome my mom is.  She was 'plucky' and I love a plucky heroine in a good story.  Only she could accidentally climb a mountain.  That's why I hope to climb Mt. Marcy next summer and eventually climb to Mt. Everest Base Camp.  My mom was incredible and it was an honor to be her daughter!

A Small Victory...

Brr! It's starting to get chilly outside which means as much as I don't want to admit it, summer is ending and fall is beginning.  I actually love fall -- don't get me wrong, but I'm not so much looking forward to another long, dark winter. I was just starting to get outside and exercise!

So tonight I went to pull on a pair of jeans for the first time since May and guess what?  They were loose!  *happy dance*  They aren't exactly falling off yet (perhaps another 15 lbs or so) but they are definitely not tight. They were very tight when I last wore them so this is an improvement.

Tonight I walked another 3.5 miles and am up to 120 crunches.  I also went back to Weight Watchers (finally!) this week.  I'm still hovering right at 12 lbs lost. I'm not sure I'll quite make my goal of 18 lbs for this first quarter (which is at the end of September) but since I started later in July that is okay.  As long as I continue my trend of losing weight I am good with that.

Somehow, I know my mom is proud of me.

Game - Set - Match

So last weekend I continued my foray into getting more active.  I walked over 3 miles twice more and continued doing crunches. I also took advantage of an offer from my cousin to go and play some tennis. It felt so good to get out on the court and hit the ball around for a while. We ended up playing for 2.5 hours which made it great exercise as well.

I played tennis in high school but haven't played very much since then.  I'm not very good but I did manage to keep up with my cousin, who is a far better player than I will ever be. (Especially my backhand!) 

I share this to say that it is making me think about what other ways I can change up my exercise program. In the past when I try to exercise I have tended to get in a rut, doing the same thing every time.  Clearly, walking (and eventually running) needs to figure prominently since I am also training to trek in the mountains.  However, I'd also like to work in some alternative exercise such as tennis and yoga to keep things a little more interesting. 

I'm still struggling with my crazy, crazy schedule right now but I'm trying to work in the exercise when I can. I certainly feel better on the days when I can exercise and I also find that I'm sleeping better.

I also went back to Weight Watchers (finally!) tonight. I'm pleased to report that I'm up to a total of 12 lbs. lost so far! 

So how do you like to exercise? What motivates you to keep working out?

Week in Review

 

So I am heading here in just a few hours :).  But before I do I wanted to do a little bit of a week in review post to capture some of my current thoughts.

The Good:
**I walked 3 miles and did 100 crunches 3 times this week.  Up until now I haven't added in any coordinated exercise routine. It felt good to get out and stretch my muscles again.  I figure that since I'm losing weight and also training to trek in the Himalayas every step I take in training is a step in my journey!

**I took my  lunch every day this week.  I haven't officially started Weight Watchers again but I know that most fruit and vegetables are 'free' points now so I've been trying to get ahead and eat a lot of those with my lunch. They are filling and good for you!

**I have started working in drinking water to my daily routine.  I would say three out of five days this week I managed to drink an extra 16-20 ounces of water over what I normally drink.  Obviously that needs to go up, but it's a start!

Needs Improvement:
**Well next week my goal is to do for my dinners what I did for my lunches (ie. get them under control).  I continue to believe that the last 30-40 lbs. that I have gained are almost all related to my lifestyle.  Eating on the go, not cooking for myself, not exercising..etc.  So some of this weight will come off just by changing those things (clearly to take off all of it I will have to do more than that, though).  My dinners this week were a struggle as I ate out for four of five and the fifth one I cheated and got a ready to eat meal at Wegmans!

Goals for Next Week:
**Eat dinner at home at least 2 nights (with a real home-cooked meal).  Hopefully each week I can increase the amount of days I eat at home by one but this week we'll start with two!

**Increase my daily water intake.  I'd like to try to double what I am drinking now.

**Work out again 3 times and play tennis with my cousin!  I do realize that I can't always rely on walking for my fitness (boring!).  Tennis, yoga, fitness classes...something will have to be thrown in to change it up a bit!

All in all a pretty good week.  Coincidentally it was also a quiet week at work. We'll see what happens when that starts up in full speed again.  I weighed myself on Monday and was down a total of 11.4 lbs.  After my disastrous dinners though I gained a pound and a half back by Wednesday (now you know why it wasn't a weigh in Wednesday).  But this morning I'm back down again and actually at 11.8 lbs!

Enjoy the weekend everyone!

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Balance

The key to keeping your balance is knowing when you've lost it. Anonymous

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I love the quote above, but if I am honest I think it should read just a bit differently. I would say the key to keeping your balance is knowing when you're about to lose it.  As humans, however, we do not often have that blessed foresight that would keep us from crashing and burning as we so often do.  

Balance is one of those trendy words that is thrown around a lot today. I've heard people say they are working to keep a 'work-life balance.'  I always wonder how exactly they can do that or truly if they really even understand what it means.  If you asked me the question, "do you wish to lead a balanced life?" my answer is yes!  However, it's sometimes very hard to figure out what exactly that balance should be. 

In truth it isn't just work & life that need to be balanced, it's life in general.  Your home life, family life, work life, volunteering life, spiritual life etc.  I would suggest that in this day and age of constant communication it is really hard to do that, at least for me.

I've been through this before, unfortunately. I can look back at a handful of points in my life where I would say that I approached 'burnout'.  I have a hard time saying no to others and ultimately I tend to overcommit myself.  I hate to let people down but in the end I run myself ragged.  It's a fine line between being selfish with your time and being wise with your time. I don't like to be seen as selfish but unfortunately that often leads me to act unwisely.

Part of this process of getting 'healthy' goes beyond just the physical goal of losing weight and climbing to Everest Base Camp. It is also about me restoring balance (or at least figuring out what that might look like for me).  I love my job and I think I'm pretty good at it too. When I first started it almost five years ago I wasn't busy enough.  I'm not sure when that changed but now I have the opposite problem, I'm too busy! I first realized it last year when my mom was sick. I was incredibly busy between work and taking care of her. After she passed away I expected that to ease just a bit but if anything I feel even more busy.

It's not just as simple as leaving on time at the end of the workday however. I have made commitments to projects that I must (and want to) fulfill. It will not be fixed overnight. However, I want to begin looking at my life through a more balanced lens.  What am I called to do with this life and how can I best organize my time to accomplish that?  For starters that means having some different priorities. I am trying to get involved in a local church (beyond just attending) and also to find time to exercise as simple as that sounds.  Certain weeks of the month I find myself with early mornings and late nights which doesn't leave a lot of down time.  I don't have many answers right now but at least I am beginning to think about it. I think that is a good first step.  

Surely I'm not alone in feeling this way  .Who else feels too busy & overwhelmed?

Smart Choices...

If I am successful in meeting my goals it will be the result of a million good choices that I made along the way. I wish that it were as easy as making the decision once, but I know that it is more than that. Undoubtedly I will make a few bad choices along the way as well.

Tonight, however, I am celebrating a couple good decisions that I made today.  I had a huge work event yesterday that left me feeling very physically exhausted. I got home at a normal time tonight and instead of laying on the couch (like I wanted to) I decided to lace up my new sneakers and go for a walk. I walked for an hour, did some crunches and push ups and then went for a quick swim.  That was a great set of decisions for a couple reasons.  First, it got me moving. I've been making healthier eating choices this month but I haven't had the time to start any exercise regimen.  This was a terrific start. I always feel better (and sleep better) when I've done some exercise.  Secondly, it was a great decision as I also strive to get a better sense of balance in my life. I'll share more about that in the coming weeks but as I've said before, this isn't just a physical journey for me.  Another piece of it is restoring this work-life balance that I seemed to lose at some point.

My second wise choice today was pretty simple, I ate the lunch I took to work. I was temped to go out for a quick bite when I was running errands (and that was definitely something I used to do often) but I stuck to my original plan. In fact, I've been making and taking my lunch to work pretty regularly all month.

I know I don't weigh in officially until Wednesday but I can usually tell when I've lost some weight. I've been feeling that way for a couple days so I let curiosity get the better of me tonight and I have indeed lost weight!  From July I am down a total of 6.4 lbs and from March a total of 11.4 lbs!

That's a great way to end the day. One decision at a time!

Weigh-in Wednesday

Enough about perspective, it's time to update you on how I am actually doing.  Well...see that is why perspective is so important.  Strictly speaking I'm still down 3.2 lbs from where I started this journey (down at least 8 lbs from my highest weight) but that is a couple pounds higher than I was last time.

That is why perspective is so important and also why I'm not ONLY measuring my success by the scale.  See in the last few weeks I've traveled twice and when I was home, I had a very busy schedule.  That's one of my big problems right now, I don't always have complete control over what I'm eating (I can, of course, control portions though).  Looking back over the last few weeks and where I've been I am actually pleased that I'm doing as well as I am.

A couple other good things:

• I've been making healthier choices even when I go out.  I've been trying to skip fried foods if at all possible.  Today I ordered a grilled chicken sandwich. I love grilled chicken but usually when I go out that is when I give in and get a fried chicken sandwich. Today I restrained myself, and I didn't force myself to finish the meal. I stopped when I was full!
• I haven't been able to get on a regular walking schedule yet, but in LA and certainly last weekend in Michigan I had days with extensive walking. In fact, the day I got to LA I went out to explore the city on foot so I could work in a little exercise!
• Tonight I went for a swim when I got home. Swimming laps and treading water is great exercise!
• I've been taking my lunch almost every day (except today when I left it at home) and eating lots of fruit with my sandwich.

This whole move to get healthier encompasses more than just my weight. I also realize that I am just too busy. I'm trying to fix that but I'm involved in a number of things with commitments right now so it's going to take a little time to get my schedule evened out a bit.  It's easy as a single person to over-commit yourself. No one is waiting at home for me so I just keep saying yes.  Part of this process is realizing that its better to do a few things and do them well than to try to be all things to all people.

Next week I hope to have taken off those couple extra pounds and I see no reason why I won't do that. I'm taking this one day and one decision at a time...

Just for fun...a photo I took in LA.